Thankful

Another Thanksgiving was upon us and we were knee deep in our preparations. We were looking forward to having another family feast at our house. We knew this would be a little difficult so soon after PopPop's passing, but we were happy everyone could be together. It would be great to have all the Harkins crew here.

Alek had a follow-up ENT appt to check on a stubborn ear tube that had never fallen out and also to discuss some other symptoms. After an exam and x-ray it was determined he needed surgery. He needed two more tubes in as there was persistent fluid in both ears and he also needed his adenoids removed. They were blocking 3/4 of his airway. This explains the snoring and restless sleep! They offered us the day before Thanksgiving so we took it.

I managed to get alot done the weekend before and also enjoyed my 20th HS reunion! Yikes, 20 years?!? 20, that just freaks me out, I dont feel like I have been out of HS twenty years? It was fun and it was great to see some old friends, whom I might add, look fabulous and the same as we did back then!! But, the clothes, all those pictures from the 80's, the hair? That was a tragic fashion decade for sure!

Tuesday was the boys Thanksgiving feast and show at LL. This would be Alek's last one there. Their songs were cute and Maks actually participated this year, I was so proud of him. He is making such great progress. He sang loudly as well. It was great up until the time Alek and Maks were standing next to each other dancing and swinging their arms together, Maks got a little aggressive and whacked Alek. I tried to make pretend I didn't know them! :o) Thankfully a quick on her feet teacher seperated them for the remainder of the program. We had a great lunch together with all the trimmings. It was a wonderful afternoon.

Wednesday was surgery. We had prepped Alek on the day by visiting the CHOP website for kids and playing the games and listening to the cartoon character talk about surgery. He was well prepared. He did great pre-op and we were cracking up watching the giggle juice kick in. He was sooo stoned, it was comical. My heart broke though and I teared up watching him head back to the OR, all of a sudden he looked so little to me. It was a tense 45 minutes for me, but soon the doc came out and said all went well. He wound up also having an issue with a turbinate in his nose which was also causing a blockage so they fixed that as well. We then headed back to post-op and he was a mess. He had such a hard time. He was crying, disoriented and kept trying to itch his face. He seemed like he was in a lot of pain. It was heart breaking. He seemed to settle once I climbed on the stretcher with him and then gave him some more pain meds. He just needed to settle and sleep. At one point he must have become more oriented because he looked at me and said, "where are we"?. He then went on to have a couple popsicles. Soon we were sprung free and we headed home. He napped alot, would wake up and want to play and then would quickly feel bad and lay back down. He did throw up twice, but had a great night sleep and by Thanksgiving you would never know he had surgery. He has barely snored and is doing great. We see a difference already!

Thanksgiving brought a beautiful fall day. The cooking went well, the kids were excited for everyone to come over, especially their cousin Jake. He is like a rock star in our house-it is so funny. I wouldn't be surprised if they soon requested poster size pics of Jake to be hung on their walls.
Pop and Noni, stopped by for appetizers and cocktails on the way to Grammom's house. The boys enjoyed their visit, and loved the goodies for Maks' birthday and the new shoes for Alek. The rest of the family arrived shortly after. It was a great day, food was great, thanks to everyone who brought the sides. We stuffed ourselves big time. I know it was especially hard day for Granny, but I am glad we could all be together. PopPop was in our thoughts and we know he was looking down on all of us.

We are so thankful for our family and it is wonderful to be able to live so close to everyone and share all our holidays together.
We enjoyed the long holiday weekend and took advantage of having no plans to get caught up on cleaning and xmas decorating. Our outdoor lights went up smoothly with no yelling and Kevin even kicked it up a notch by venturing onto the roof to outline the front of our house. It looks great and the kids love it. They are getting very excited for Christmas--this definitely is a fun time of year! We are all excited to be taking a trip with our friends and their kids the day after Christmas to Bimini. We know it will make things a little extra hectic leading up to it, but the relaxation and adventure for the family will be so worth it!
So good bye November, hello December, another year flying by!

A Family Is Like
by Nicole M. O'Neil
A Family is like a circle
the connection never ends
and even if at times it breaks
in time it always mends
a family is like the stars
somehow there always there
families are those who help who support and always care
A Family is like a book
the endings never clear
but through the pages of the book
their love is always near
A family is many things
with endless words that show
who they are and what they do
and how they teach you so you know
but don’t be weary if it's broken
or if through time its been so worn
families are like that-
they can be split up or torn
but even if this happens
your family will always be
they help define just who you are
and will be apart of you eternally.

Make a Smilebox slideshow

Happy 3rd Family Day Maks-Joseph!!

Three years ago today, November 20, 2006 a kind judge in Murmansk, Russia declared that we would forever be Maks-Joseph Kirill's parents. After a stressful court session, those were sweet words to hear. In our hearts he was our son, but now in the eyes of the court and the world, it was official!



It is amazing to see how much he has changed from the sickly and sad little boy we first met. To look at those initial pictures both amazes me and breaks my heart. It is so neat to look at the picture progression and see this light and life appear in his face and his eyes. he is truly a miracle. From his rough and premature start in life, he fought and he still fights. He is one tough cookie and I love his fire and resiliency, even when he is driving us nuts!!

Our journey with Maks was special. We did get to share in certain "milestones" we didn't think we would when we set out on our second adoption and anticipated adopting a little person closer to 18 months.

We got to meet Maks on his 1st birthday. While he had no idea the importance of that day, it meant alot to us.

We also got to share Thanksgiving with him in Moscow. While we desperately missed Alek and our family back home, it was amazing to spend that time with him in Russia. We had so many things to be thankful for that year.

Maks and Alek were brothers from the moment they met at the airport. They took to each other quickly and Alek has made an incredible big brother. For all the Alek went through during that time, being 2 1/2 and having his parents go away twice and suddenly show up with a new person who was getting into his toys, he did great. It was so much better than we anticipated! Yes, they battle and fight, but they are buds and they have each other's backs. I love it and I hope they always stay that way.

It has been a wonderful and crazy three years with Maks. He has come such a long way and we are so proud of him. He is truly an amazing little man and we are honored to be his parents!

We love you Mackey, Happy Family Day!!!

Progress

The past week brought around progress reports and parent teacher conferences.
Alek was up first. Our first official parent-teacher conference. Though we had not received any bad reports or emails from his teacher and he seemed to come home everyday with greens on his charts, we were still nervous. In the back of our minds was last year. Alek had such a rough time from September to November we were worried. I never said anything ahead of time to the teacher, because I didn't want to ever label him before anything ever happened. I am glad I didn't.
The conference went really well. His teacher is fabulous and totally gets it. She showed us some of his work and what his strengths and weaknesses were. She said he was timid at first and not wanting to participate or speak out alot in class, which surprised me, but she said it didn't take long for him to open up.
We asked about behavior and his wiggles. She said, that yes he does wiggle and move, but he is not disruptive and is also focused and she doesnt expect kids to be still, especially active boys. She said she usually has him sit towards the back of the carpet when they do floor work so he is not bunched in and can move around. She said many kids need to wiggle and move to stay focused and that is ok. She said he is always focused and knows what is going on and is very involved. She said he also loves to be a helper. It was so great, I love that she gets it and gets him. He loves school and he loves her, he is excited to go everyday, he loves learning and he loves his homework.
We are so pleased and needless to say we were thrilled after this conference!

Next up was Maks. Maks' teacher is wonderful as well. She had Alek and she knows my kids well. She worked over the summer to slowly transition Maks to the older preschool room. She had expressed concern that he may struggle with the longer circle time and "education" type activities because he would be easily distracted. She also had said he never had much patience when it came time for arts and crafts activities. Never really liked coloring, which is totally true. He never wanted to color or draw. She had said we would watch and see how he would do.
Well he progress report was great. She said he is more focused. He is great in circle time, loves it, is extremely engaging and loves to participate and in fact gets sad when it is over. She said he is starting to color more and really enjoy art activities. She said the only thing was his frustration. He is a perfectionist. If it is not done the way he thinks it should be, he gets mad and throws it out. He is exactly this way at home, especially with his legos. He knows what he wants to do in his mind, but if he can't get it exactly that way, he gets very frustrated. But he is persistent and will start from scratch. He is also starting to make closer friends and he is tight with one girl in particular. So that was nice to hear.
She said all in all he is on target for his age and his group and he is doing well. I was very happy. It is nice to hear it from someone else!
His speech is slowly improving. We are getting yet another therapist, which to me is a big part of the issue. They keep changing on us. But I hear great things about the new one, so I am hopeful. He still struggles with T,F, S sounds, but he can do it, you just have to slow him down. If he is slow and repeating after you he can do it. We basically undestand 90% of what he says, so that is a big improvement.

It has been a great fall so far in terms of school, so we are thrilled.
We are looking forward to a fun family Thanksgiving that we will be hosting. The only downside is Alek now needs surgery. he will be having his third set of tubes placed and his adenoids out the day before Thanksgiving. The surgeon said he would be fine, probably just tired and maybe some pain, but we will be able to control it. There are also no eating restrictions. Hopefully this will help curb the infections, mouth breathing and restless sleep. I am sure we will see a big improvement.

Next up: Maks 3rd Family Day, November 20, 2009! Hard to believe 3 years ago we were spending Thanksgiving in Moscow.

Learning

I have seen these articles lately which discuss different kinds of parents from "helicopter" , "black hawk" to "free range" to "slow parenting". The names were hilarious so of course I had to read on. I had heard of some of descriptions before and read on as I noticed some of my own characteristics in one of the articles. Part of me has to chuckle and wonder how any of us even survived childhood let alone become successful adults?
It did get me thinking about where I fall and also what I have learned in the 5 years I have been a parent.

Safety/Health:
I often think how I grew up, being able to run all over our neighborhood, ride our bikes, explore the woods by our house that led down to Valley Green and Fairmount Park. We could ride our bikes or walk on the main street to go to the library, Dunkin donuts or the mini mart. I was able to jump on Septa when I was 11 to catch a ride up the YMCA for swimming. I played hard, I got hurt, I had fun and I learned. I also was babysitting at age 10-who would ever think nowadays to allow a 10 yr old to babysit? We ate home cooked meals, but we also had candy, we had McDonald's treats. We had TV dinners. Nothing was labeled "organic" or "free range".

I realize how different it is now. I admit it, I hovered, I didnt want them to get hurt. I flinched everytime they fell. Now, I even run right next to them or ahead of them while they ride their bikes or scooters down the street, because I am worried someone may back out of their driveway and hit them. I was thinking to myself, when will I ever be comfortable letting them ride their bikes around the neighborhood without me? It scares me, I dont want to be like that. I want them to have freedom, explore, and learn without me being arms length away. I hope I can overcome my fears of this world and not project those fears onto them. It seems like such a fine line in teaching them how to be safe without scaring the crap out of them.
I bought and still do buy alot of organic. I do my best to avoid artificials dyes. Alek never had any sugar until the cake on his 1st bday. I kept him from candy and fast food. I forced Maks to eat his vegetables until he started liking broccholi. They eat what we make. They have to eat at least a little bit of everything that is on their plate.

What I have learned:
I cant put them in a bubble, they need some freedoms, they need some space, they need to fall and learn how to rub off the boo boo and bounce back.
So I do try to give them extended boundaries with their bikes and scooters and sit and watch. I dont flinch as much as I used, but I guess having two very physically active boys will do that to you. I let them flip and experiment on the jungle gym and try tricks with their scooters (as long as their helmets are on). Yes, they fall and get hurt, but mommy fixes it or they brush it off and keep playing.
It is ok to have treats and fast food on occasion. It is ok to have candy as a treat. Not everything has to be organic. They will survive and thrive, just like we did. Everything in moderation.

Activities
I can see how easy it is to get overscheduled. There are so many opportunities for kids today, even infants with mommy and me classes. I admit, I sign my kids up. I get hooked on it. We have done swimming, soccer, T-ball, Little Gym classes, karate, ice skating and Gymboree.
What I have learned:
Spread it out, one activity a session or season and the class cannot be more then 2 days per week. Even then those days seem exhausting to me, from work to after school to the activity. I dont know how people do it everyday, with multiple kids in multiple activities. I guess you ease into it and by them time they are old enough for sports that occur everyday, it is second nature to you? But hopefully I can stick with that rule and not get talked into extra activities by the kids!

Comparing and analyzing:
it is so easy to compare your kids to others and I think second nature. You want to make sure your kiddo is keeping up or even ahead! I think this occurs even more so with PI kids. You know they didn't get a great start in life, so you want to help them catch up and truthfully you would love to see it happen quickly. You also spend alot of time preparing yourself and learning about issues related to adoption, attachment, and development. You read the horror stories and the good ones as well. But then you find yourself analyzing every little thing, wondering what it is a sign of? Am I doing something wrong, what specialist should I see, what book should I read?
What I have learned:
It is so great to be prepared and educate yourself on all the things that can happen or issues that can arise, red flags for development or attachment issues, but it is also very important to learn expected development and stages and to keep in mind that all children are different. You should not compare. If you learn about development, there is a wide range of time that is acceptable, some kids hit milestones quickly and early and others are late bloomers and that is ok. I have to thank many of my friends, especially teacher friends, for reminding me of this.
Dont spend your time obsessing and worrying and constantly comparing your child to others. You may miss out on alot of fun stuff with your child. Instead listen to your gut, your mom instincts. if you feel something is not right, then definitely get it checked out. But give your children time to go through phases and stages. I also think we have such high expectations of our children nowadays. When we were in preschool, we learned so much through play, we were not expected to sit still for long periods or learn advanced concepts, yet many of us still managed to become successful adults.
Kids that are going to be brilliant/gifted and kids that will struggle need their accomodations and it is so great those opportunities are there, but otherwise even if your child is not writing or reading at age 4 or speaking 3 different languages, chances are they still will be caught up with their classmates come 1st grade. Another thing I have learned is there is nothing wrong with being average as long as you are trying your best. I want my kids to have time to be kids, I want to encourage them and guide them through school and any other activites they choose. I want them to want to do their best. I want them to learn what it is like to fail and be able to pick yourself up and try better next time. I really have to make an effort not to coddle, it is ok to fail, ok to fall and ok not to be the best at everything, but rather give your best in anything you do.

Everyday I learn something new and I keep evolving as a parent. I am not perfect and I dont have to be and I cannot do it all, even if I wanted to. Despite my imperfections, the boys are doing well. They are happy and healthy. They fall right on or above those developmental stages charts. They misbehave, they find lots of ways to get dirty or get hurt. They are exhausting. They are sweet. They are funny. They are getting good reports from school. They have lots of friends. They love and they are loved. All in all I think we are doing pretty well here.

November is National Adoption Month

Every child has the right to live in a loving, safe and permanent family.

National Adoption Day and National Adoption month is national and collective effort created to raise awareness of the 129,000 children living in foster care in the US.

For me it is also a time to think about children throughout the world, living without the stability and permanency of a loving family. Children in foster care, orphanages, or living on the street, living without hope, love and safety.

UNICEF estimates that approximately 143 million children around the world live as orphans.

143 million, that number is staggering to me. It just seems daunting. Something I think about daily. I think of those other little faces back in the orphanages in Kirov and Murmansk and just wish I could bring them all home with me.

It just seems so overwhelming, A problem too difficult to figure out the answer to, so easier to just make pretend it doesn't exist?

Thankfully there are organizations out there who choose not to ignore this great need and they work daily to make a difference.

Adoption, while it is an amazing and life changing journey is not for everyone. But, No matter what way your child comes into your family to me it is miracle and a gift and one that should never be taken for granted. Adoption is not easy and it is not for the faint of heart. But the rewards and joy you experience are like nothing you have ever felt before. If you ever hear someone say, "just adopt" you know that person has no idea what they are talking about! If only it were so simple. It takes time and effort, both emotionally, financially and logistically.

So if you feel you can open your heart and home to a child who needs you, then I say go for it!! if not, that is ok to, there are other ways you can help!!

These organizations I will mention below can always use your help in other ways. So take the time to explore the websites, request information or give a donation. No matter what you decide to do, big or small, it will make a difference!

Joint Council for International Children's Services

http://jcics.org

Please check out their information for the Families for Orphans Act of 2009 (H.R. 3070)

http://thomas.loc.gov/cgi-bin/query/z?c111:H.R.3070:

Sign the Petition!

Please also check out their movement

Be the Answer!

http://www.jcics.org/bta%20about%201.htm

The Dave Thomas Foundation

http://www.davethomasfoundation.org/

Please check out their website on all the ways you can get involved to help promote adoptions of the more then 129,000 children living in foster care in the US.

Adopt US Kids

http://www.adoptuskids.org/

Filled with resource information, advocacy and photolistings of children waiting for the forever families!

Rainbow Kids

http://www.rainbowkids.com/

Information on US foster adoptions, International Adoptions, articles, waiting children, advocacy. It is all here, lots to check out and learn!

National Council For Adoption

http://www.adoptioncouncil.org/about/about_intro.html

Champion of adoption advocacy, policy, initiatives and reform.

Act of Kindness

http://www.actofkindness.blogspot.com/

Blog of an amazing couple who took a leap of faith and took things into their own hands and have made an amazing difference!

Please take note of their current challenge: Pie to the Face for kids. If this looks like fun for you, please donate and choose my friend, Melanie!!

Thank you for the taking the time to explore these sites and hopefully finding something that fits you!

If you dont have the time but still would like to make a donation, get in touch with me, I can let you know about some projects going on with our agency and the foundation. After all if it were not for them, Alek and Maks would not be here!

When you hug and kiss your child tonight think of all those children who won't get a hug and kiss and a bedtime story. Anything you do or give, no matter how small or big, makes a difference. Make a difference in the life of a child.

Thanks to all of you who make a difference in the lives of my children. We know that without our family and friends we would not be the Harkins, Party of Four!

Scarey, Skates, Stats

Halloween came very quickly and seemed to catch me by surprise as always, given the fact I was buying my candy about 2 hours before trick or treating started! I had grand plans for great costumes for the boys. One would be a dragon and the other a knight. I was excited. They wanted no parts of it. They wanted to go to the store and pick out their own. How quickly you lose control over dressing them up. So off to Target we went. They could pick out what they wanted as long as it didn't have a gun or a weapon. Alek chose the Incredible Hulk for his muscles and Maks picked a Power Ranger. They were very excited, so that is what counts.

They had a fun Halloween. I helped with Alek's fall party in his class. It was alot of fun and very cute to see him in action in his kindergarten class. Friday Alek was off so he went to LL all day with Maks and they had their Halloween party and parade. They had a blast. Halloween we went and visited Granny in their costumes and then headed back home for the action. The rain cut short our rounds, but we headed to our neighbors for a little party. The kids had a blast. So we spent the next day recovering from sugar high and Phillies loss.

We signed Alek up for skating lessons. Kevin had bought him hockey skates only for us to find out they rather them use figure skates to learn, but the skates are included with the lesson. So that was good. It was a trip watching him hit the ice. He fell alot, he has happy feet and a hard time keeping his body still. SO this will be good for him, force him to really focus on his whole body. He loved it though. He was cracking up every time he fell. It was nice, only 3 kids per teacher. Maks was very upset, he wanted lessons too. So, next session we will let him try.Maks had to try the hockey skates on though, he looks the part. We decided to take them both skating on a Friday night. It was fun, though it has probably been about 9 years since I have been on skates,thankfully I didn't fall. Maks did great, he really focuses and can be a perfectionist, he wants to get it right. He took his time and let the ice do the work, not his feet. He was cracking me up, because when he fell he would get mad at the ice, "stupid ice!" Alek tested out the hockey skates and really stuck with it. Kevin said he did better his second class this week. He does enjoy so that is what matters.
Next up was Maks' 3 yr well visit. He has grown a little over 3 inches in a year. His new stats are 41.5 inches and 38 pounds. He really is getting tall and thinning out. Sorry Mike, no longer can call him Fatty McButterpants! He does remain solid and tough!
Well I blinked and October is gone. November is here, seems like we were sitting on the beach yesterday. Lots ahead for the month. Taking the boys for their passports next week for our trip the end of the year. Alek heads to ENT to figure out what to do with this tube in his ear that wont come out on its own and now gets infected. Both have dental appts. Then its Thanksgiving at our house. I love Thanksgiving, love the smells, the food, the fun and most important, family.

I just saw an ad today that Santa will be coming to the local mall this weekend-WHAT!!???!!! Seriously, they can't wait until after Thanksgiving, it just seems wrong. Bad enough we have to see all the xmas stuff out already, but the Big Guy making an early appearance. Just ridiculous. Why do we have to rush it all?

Gold

We have gotten back into our routines and it seems like we are as busy as ever. I feel like some days when I look at the calendar the days and months just fly by. Trying to figure out when to squeeze visits in, playdates, fun activities. I really wish I had a pause or slow motion button. I do try to stop myself and take certain things in, to imprint the memories on my brain of the boys playing together or working together or chattering in the back seat of the car. I want to always remember their little voices and little faces along with the daily little stuff that is sometimes frustrating and exhausting. As the calendar pages just seem to keep turning I dont want to miss or forget.

This has all been on my mind so much more as we just completed Maks' 3rd and final post placement report. That's it, we are done. It seems like just yesterday we were walking into the baby home and reacting in surprise how solid and chubby this little man was and now here were are, done our final report.

It is so easy to get wrapped up in the daily grind and balancing act between work, school, sports and family activities. How can we do this and not take anything for granted?

As I was looking at pictures I took during a little Fall hike we did with the kids I was thinking of the Robert Frost poem:

Nature's first green is gold,

Her hardest hue to hold.

Her early leaf's a flower;

But only so an hour.

Then leaf subsides to leaf,

So Eden sank to grief,

So dawn goes down to day

Nothing gold can stay.

I always felt he was connecting the seasons to the cycle of life, childhood as amazing and precious as it is, quickly ends. It is a good reminder to me to stop and watch and not take any of it for granted. This is my kick in the butt now so to speak, stop and breathe, take it all in because life is just far to short.

Make a Smilebox scrapbook

Life

Where to begin..I know it has been awhile since last time I sat down to write.

Life happens.

Happiness: Alek is doing fabulous in kindergarten, he loves it. All reports are great, he loves homework. His favorite special is library day. We are already amazed at how much he has learned in a month. Alek wrapped up his soccer season, he loved it. He got a great medal from his coach and already misses his buddies on his team. Next up, learn to skate for hockey! That starts right before Halloween, should be interesting. He is very excited.

Maks struggled a bit with his transition to new class, and we had a couple weeks with scattered behavior reports and bathroom accidents, but he seems back on track and happier. He is a piece of work, he is so tough, but he just cracks you up! He knows how to push daddy's buttons big time. The looks and sideways glares he gives you are a trip. His speech is slowly improving, we still struggle with T's and F's, but he is definitely a lot easier to understand. Maks and I did a soccer class together, though because of life and weather we missed a handful. He liked it but wasn't really into following instructions especially when it was mommy having to coach. He will be better off in a situation where he has an actual coach. Checking out some opportunities for him now, leaning towards some more swim lessons, he loves that.

Sadness: PopPop H has been struggling with health issues for a bit now and got worse as summer ended. He battled very hard as he always did. We had a great Labor Day dinner at his house, celebrating T's bday. The next day he went into the hospital and by October to inpatient hospice. It was a long month, he fought hard, came back to us for a week and then passed away peacefully and gracefully with all of us around him on October 7th. He was laid to rest after a beautiful service on October 12th. He is deeply missed but we also know he is at peace and will always be watching over Granny and the rest of his family.

We know the kids struggled in their own way with PopPop's passing. Alek has asked me several times if he is with Corie and Kaiser in heaven and I tell him yes and he will say he is sad or get real quiet. We have a great book I have read to him that seemed to help. Maks doesn't really get it at all. He just always asks if he can go see him and the dogs, like we hop on an airplane and go for a visit.
I wanted to thank Mike and C for being there for last minute kiddo drop offs and for feeding, entertaining the boys and keeping them happy and safe while we were at the hospital or hospice. They love hanging with "their gaals" and big Mike too (I think we owe you a flashlight or two?). Thanks to Jeff and Amy for being very cool sitters during the viewing-the kids had a blast and still talk about Jeff's scooter course and their arts and crafts. Your help meant a lot to us--you guys are the best!!!!!!
Thanks to everyone who sent their support, thoughts and prayers. I know it meant a great deal to the family to know how much we were supported.

Thanks to K for sending this to me 2 weeks ago, it was beautiful and meant alot:
“Love is stronger than death, even though it cant stop death from happening, but no matter how hard death tries, it cannot separate people from love. It cannot take away our memories either. In the end, life is stronger than death”.

Someone is Growing up: During all of this, our Maks-Joseph turned 4 on October 12th! We celebrated his "halloween" birthday party on Saturday Oct 10th. He woke up telling me "I growing up, I party today". That boy loves a good party! Sometimes too much as he spent part of it in time out. It was great having our family and close friends there to celebrate Maks, it was not the same without PopPop, but it was a great time for the kids. He loved his presents and being the center of attention.

On his birthday he woke up and we reminded him he turned 4! That day is extra special for us, because it is also metcha day. We met Maks on his 1st birthday! He has been home almost 3 years. We are getting ready for our final post placement report too! So hard to believe.
Maks to Alek: I getting bigger, I 4, I almost like you (as he holds up 4 fingers)! Alek to Maks: no way dude-you got one more finger to go! They crack me up!! I love it.

Inspirational: Lastly for October, was the Breast Cancer 3 Day on Oct 16-18th. As life would go, 2 Nor easters decided to make their way into our region. Our team, The Rack Pack had trained hard for almost a year and collectively raised over 25K!

We were ready to walk for our ladies both in honor and memory. We bought our rain gear and were ready to roll! Unfortunately mother nature had other ideas. The first two days of the walk were officially cancelled, but that didn't stop us. We stayed on course as much as we could. We checked into our hotel Friday by lunch. We walked on our own throughout Philly Friday and Saturday. We crisscrossed the city several times it seemed. We saw neighborhoods we normally wouldn't, we hit the historical sites we had not seen in a long time (we even made a pit stop at the Constitution Center to see the Princess Diana exhibit) , sometimes in rained, sometimes it was windy and sometimes it was cold. But it was wonderful! We had a great time as a team and it felt great to be out there walking. It may not have been as we planned, but really is life ever as you plan? So the 3 Day officially became a 1Day on Sunday. We joined 2600 others and braved the nasty morning conditions as we walked throughout the city. As I walked I thought of the brave women I was walking for (Kerry, Deb, Dale and Stacie), the beautiful warriors who fought this battle head on and won! Really, how much more inspiration does one need, what's a little cold and rain compared to cancer? Someone up there was looking down on all of us as the rain went away for the remainder of the walk. We ended our journey at the Navy Yard. In the end our team managed to walk close to 40 miles all outdoors as planned! Watching the survivors parade in proudly in their pink was amazing, I know there wasn't a dry eye on our team. These women are amazing, the feeling and energy there was unbelievable. It was truly an amazing experience and one we look forward to enjoying again next year, hopefully with a bigger team as well!!

So thats our story since September. Highs and lows, the rollercoaster of life.

"Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass. It's about learning to dance in the rain."

School is cool!

Well the day finally arrived. The excitement had been building for a long time now. The 1st day of school arrived. My baby was heading off to kindergarten. The boys were very excited to get back to school and see their friends. Maks had to carry a back pack as well so he could be "big" like his brother.

Our school district is half day, but Alek is also in the kindergarten class at our day care, so he is essentially full day.

He started his day at day care K class, he was very excited to be with his new teacher there and have all his school supplies. Right after lunch Kevin and I picked him up and took him to his other school, 1 minute away. The parent were to attend with the children the first day, so that was perfect.

The school is so cute and the his classroom was so cool. We were excited to get this teacher as our neighbors raved about her. She is young, energetic and is apparently good with active boys! So perfect for Alek. The classroom was bright and fun. We were very impressed.

We met the principal and got the low down on what to expect throughout the year. We also had to fill out more papers so while we did this the teacher read to the kids and got to know them.

We also did a scavenger hunt together so the kids could familiarize themselves with the room.

Alek loved it, he was so happy and excited to finally be a kindergartner. Several times I had to compose myself as I felt my eyes tearing up. So hard to believe my little bald drooly baby was now in school.

I am so happy he is excited and looking forward to this new experience and we cannot wait to see how much he learns this year. I know we will be amazed. He has already told me he can't wait for homework to start! So funny, you know that wont last long.

After school we took Alek over to the Dairy Queen for a special treat. It was a great day and we are so proud of Alek.

Buses started the next day. I went to the day care to watch him get on the bus. The bus was really late, so I panicked and just drove him. But here, all the buses were late, too many parents taking pictures. He got on the bus for the ride home and Kevin met him. He said he was really cute and so happy to be riding the bus.

I went back the next day at lunch to watch him get on the bus and it all worked out well. He got on with his little friend and kept waving to me. He just looked so small on that big bus. I did break down completely. He kept waving and smiling and the tears were streaming down my face. I had done pretty good up until then. So I sat in my car and cried before heading back to work. The time just goes so fast and they grow so quickly, I just wish I could slow it down somedays.

Anyway, He had a great first week and received stickers each day. Alek was excited to have his music, art, and library specials this week. He loved them all and we have been reading his library book every night. I am very proud of his enthusiasm and excitement and how well he did with the transition this week. The other night as he was getting ready for bed, he said, "Mom, you know what...school is really cool".

Beaches

The end of August brought around our annual vacation. This year we headed south to Nags Head in the Outer Banks. Two years ago we were there with two other families and their kiddos, this year it was even more interesting as we were joined by 3 families. 8 adults, 12 kids, ranging in age from 4 months to 10 years old! We had a wonderful large house with plenty of room for all the craziness. It was in a great community that had a pool and beach club and private beach access. We also had our own pool and hot tub on the upper deck. The first weekend (FRI-SUN) was beautiful weather, sunny and breezy. The surf was rough, so no real swimming in the ocean, but that was ok with us. The kids only ventured in to their ankles and calves so less worry for us adults. Monday brought rain so bowling we went. The rest of the week remained overcast and gray, but we still had a blast. The kids all had so much fun together, from playing on the beach, swimming in the pool, hanging in the hot tub, bowling, mini golf, kite flying. The adults had a great time too, lots of cocktails, great food (each couple took a turn cooking), girls night out, guys night out, cocktails in hot tub after kids went to sleep and outlet shopping. It was a great week! Alek, Maks and myself took a little roadtrip over to East Carolina U to see Krissy. It was a lot of fun. We had a nice lunch, great tour of the campus and shopping in the bookstore. We all got t-shirts and the boys got foam pirate swords. They were so happy to see Krissy but completely confused over why their other cousins weren't living with her. It was sweet.
So after a great week in Nags Head, we packed up on Friday and headed up to Pop and Noni's in Delaware for a fun holiday weekend at the beach. Weather was gorgeous, sunny and breezy. It was a nice change from our gray days. As always the kids had a blast on the beach, swimming and rock and shell collecting. The community had a little party Saturday night with great food, bonfire and a beautiful sunset.
It was a perfect ending to a great summer. As usual I feel sad and depressed to see summer go. I will miss my beach time and my feet in the sand. Hard to believe we have to wait 9 months for summer's return! But we are excited for the start of kindergarten and we look forward to an exciting and wonderful school year. We also just planned a trip with friends and their kids to Bimini, Bahamas, for the week between xmas and New Years. We can look forward to getting our beach fix then!!
So good bye summer and hello fall-we can't wait to see what new and exciting adventures this year brings!

Make a Smilebox slideshow

Alek's special week

Last week, was basically the week of Alek. Yes Maks was a little slighted, but we will make it up to him! Alek had K day, which is done to get the kindergartners and their parents ready for the bus! It was really cute. We all got a bus ride around the area, we pulled up to the school and the bus drop off area so they could see where they would go. The talked about bus safety. I kept looking over at Alek who was loving the bus ride, but he just looked so tiny to me in that big seat. I started to tear up and my glasses started fogging up. Amazingly I regained my composure before I embarassed him. I am still finding it hard to believe my baby is going to school. I really dont want to let go. I wish I could freeze time.

We got off the bus and the kids were shown the safe zone, where to stand, where not to, how to get on and off the bus. Then we headed inside for a quick video. Another mom and I were cracking up at the video, it was totally from the 80's. A woman had an oversized purple sweatshirt over black leggings with matching purple scrunchy socks. I think I had that outfit! It was amusing to both parents and kids. They also got snacks and goody bags. We also received their badges, where their bus numbers, emergency numbers, etc.. will go. It was a great morning and I think this was more for the parents then the kids. I am tryinjg to get over my fear that he will get on wrong bus or wont get off at his stop. I know I will be a mess the first couple days. Alek cannot wait, he said he wished our vacation was over so he could go to school. He told me he hopes he gets homework the first day. I wanted to record that because you know he will be singing a different tune years from now!

Sunday I decided Alek and I need a date day. We headed down to Philly to the Academy of Natural Sciences. Alek has been into dinosaurs, so I knew he would enjoy this place. His eyes lit up when we walked in and he saw the giant T-Rex, he barely could wait for me to pay. He loved learning about all the dinosaurs.

We spent a long time reading about each one. He kept saying "cool, amazing" and "this rocks". I loved it, it was so much fun. He also got to do a fossil dig, pet a legless lizards, look for shark teeth in the sand. There was a butterfly exhibit which was really neat and I loved it, Alek really didn't as it was too hot in the room. They had a Gecko exhibit too which he loved. They were actually pretty neat even though I am so not into those types of creatures.

We also learned alot about bee hives and they had a live working one there, with an outside exit for the bees. That was pretty wild. You could see them working the hive, you could see the honey. Alek wanted to free them. Thank God they made that Alek proof!

After all the fun, we hit the gift shop for some goodies and Alek made sure to pick out some fun stuff for Maks. That was very sweet of him.

After the museum we headed down the parkway to the Art Museum steps. I wanted to do the tourist picture thing with Alek. I did get a great video clip of him doing the Rocky run up the steps. He was quick, beat out a couple adults.

He did love the Rocky statue and loved the view. He said, I love being up high mom!
It was pretty hot so we did have to stop and cool our feet off in a fountain and enjoy a Philly soft pretzel.

As we got back in our car to head home, he thanked me and told me it was the best day ever!

It was a great day for me too. I love these memories.

Important week in our history

This week in August is an important one for our family.

August 16th marked our 5th Adoption/Family day with Alek! 5 years ago we were enjoying our beginning moments as a family in Russia. Our first night as a family was spent on a bumpy train headed to Moscow from Kirov. I so remember giving him his first bottle and just watching him in awe and amazement.

While it was a rough first night on that train as he couldn't get himself settle, after that it seemed to be an almost flawless transition. He melted into us, we held on tight and never let go.

It is so hard for me to believe that the little peanut 5 1/2 month old in these pictures is now this healthy, ahtletic, creative 5 yr old who is starting kindergarten in a few weeks!

The time just flies by. While I miss my little baby I love watching the boy he is becoming and all the new things he masters each day.

So Happy Family day to Aleksandr-you are the light of our lives!!!

Two years and two days later we received the pictures below. This was our first glimpse of Maks. How could you not fall in love with that face!?

I remember those first days were filled with excitement, stress and worry. We were so excited to be adding onto our family and for Alek to become a big brother. Yet we were also worried about Maks' health issues, how everything would change with another child, leaving Alek for 2 trips to Russia when we had only left him overnight before. We had the perfect family, so it was definitely scarey to take that leap! But wow was it worth it!Maks is amazing. For all he went through early in his life, he is a fireball, a pistol, a resilient little man, who truly amazes me. I loved watching my boys become brothers and best buds almost immediately. All our worries about Alek handling this, faded quickly. While Maks did have a rough adjustment coming home, I truly believe if it were not for Alek he would have struggled much more.
We are so blessed to have these two little men in our lives and to be their parents. While many days they leave us exhausted and bewildered, they are truly our dreams come true!