This paragraph really helped me feel better about raising boys.
"DISCIPLINE Who's harder? Boys
Why don't boys seem to listen? Turns out their hearing is not as good as girls' right from birth, and this difference only gets greater as kids get older. Girls' hearing is more sensitive in the frequency range critical to speech discrimination, and the verbal centers in their brains develop more quickly. That means a girl is likely to respond better to discipline strategies such as praise or warnings like "Don't do that" or "Use your words." "Boys tend to be more tactile -- they may need to be picked up and plunked in a time-out chair," Gurian says. They're also less verbal and more impulsive, he adds, which is especially evident in the toddler and preschool years.
These developmental differences contribute to the mislabeling of normal behavior as problematic, a growing number of observers say. Five boys for every one girl are diagnosed with a "disorder" (including conduct disorder, bipolar disorder, hyperactivity, attention deficit disorder, sensory integration disorder, and oppositional defiant disorder), says Stein, also the author of "Unraveling the ADD/ADHD Fiasco." Some kids -- most often boys -- may simply fall on the more robust end of normal. They need more opportunities to expend energy and aggression, as well as firmer limits"
Why don't boys seem to listen? Turns out their hearing is not as good as girls' right from birth, and this difference only gets greater as kids get older. Girls' hearing is more sensitive in the frequency range critical to speech discrimination, and the verbal centers in their brains develop more quickly. That means a girl is likely to respond better to discipline strategies such as praise or warnings like "Don't do that" or "Use your words." "Boys tend to be more tactile -- they may need to be picked up and plunked in a time-out chair," Gurian says. They're also less verbal and more impulsive, he adds, which is especially evident in the toddler and preschool years.
These developmental differences contribute to the mislabeling of normal behavior as problematic, a growing number of observers say. Five boys for every one girl are diagnosed with a "disorder" (including conduct disorder, bipolar disorder, hyperactivity, attention deficit disorder, sensory integration disorder, and oppositional defiant disorder), says Stein, also the author of "Unraveling the ADD/ADHD Fiasco." Some kids -- most often boys -- may simply fall on the more robust end of normal. They need more opportunities to expend energy and aggression, as well as firmer limits"
Our guys are definitely active, they love physical activities and they have alot of energy. While I joke how tiring it is, I love it, I love how they want to try new things, how they are not afraid to explore and test their limits. To me it goes along with their self confidence. I have watched Maks over the past year and a half, go from being afraid of everything to trying to keep up with his brother in most activites.
But, I also love how Alek will plop himself on the floor with a pile of books and sit there for an hour just paging through and reading or how he gets excited with the games on his little laptop and how well he can write all his letters and our names. I love how Maks will sit and build extensive creations with his Legos and how he loves to fix anything that seems to be broken. He is our little engineer or architect.
I have heard many of the comments from people, especially if we are at parties or outdoor activities, about how "busy" are boys are. I always wonder what that is "code" for. Most of the time I don't think it is a compliment!
Of course that sometimes it is hard not to question-are they really that "busy", is there something wrong with them? My gut screams no, they are doing great, but as a parent, especially adoptive parent, you still feel like you have to research and read until you are blue in the face. So I have read every article on every disorder, talked to our pediatrician, talked to their teachers, and compared my kids to the checklists (red flags and what to look for...) and come to the conclusion they are just happy, active boys.
So that is why this article was so great for me to read and for Kevin as well.
"Some kids -- most often boys -- may simply fall on the more robust end of normal. They need more opportunities to expend energy and aggression, as well as firmer limits"
Yep, that is Alek and Maks and I wouldn't want them any other way!
