Mother's Day

Me and my little men, Mother's Day 2010!

Me and my mommy

Celebrated with yearly family gathering at our house. Beautiful day, wonderful handmade cards from the boys, little flower pots handpainted with the mystery seeds inside and a beautiful new rose bush for my present.

Slept in, snugged and watched cartoons with my boys.

Fabulous Mother's Day, I am so lucky!

My first..Aleksandr

Continuing my tribute to the special little men who made me a mom....

Aleksandr, Alek, Bud, Pal, Big Guy, Little man, My Smush, CutiePatootie (although apparently only TT can call him this now), and LoveBug.

Alek, our first, the little drooly faced, bald headed, bright eyed wonder who made my dreams of motherhood come true.
It was a rollercoaster ride for us filled with crashing lows and an amazing high the moment he was placed in my arms. What a fascinating little creature. Only 5 months old, he came by car, 2 hours away to meet us in Kirov. He was brought into a room filled with anxiously awaiting parents all holding their breaths as children and caretakers came through the door. We heard the name Gubin, Gubin--oh, that was us, that was our little boy! Here we were half a world away from home and meeting our child for the first time. It is so hard to put that feeling into words. It was very surreal. I remember the feelings of caution and wanting to evaluate him as a nurse went right out the window. One look into those bright blue eyes, we were hooked. I remember him staring back at us with this quizical look and a hint of a smile and then the cries and tears came. I guess he realized he was scared, tired and hungry. His cries started an outbreak in the room. Alek received his bottle and promptly fell asleep in my arms. My first time feeding my child and getting him to sleep. It was the greatest feeling in the world.

What a brave little man he was. I can only imagine the confusion of his life those couple weeks. Long car rides for him to Kirov, people talking to him in a funny language. Being handed over in the dead of night on a train from Kirov to Moscow. How scarey it must have been for him. Those first hours of just the 3 of us in our train compartment were amazing. It was like a dream for us, but his poor little body was so stressed from all the changes and then the long travel home. Alek amazed us at how quickly he just melted into our family. Alek was such a resilient little soul, who was poked and proded and scanned all to figure out a reason for his small head circumference, all the while seeming to tell us, just chill out people, I am fine. Watch me roll over, watch me crawl, watch me walk. I am good, no worries mom!

He amazed us each day. I loved him falling asleep on my chest with his butt up in the air and his little hand wrapped around my finger. I loved watching his eyes flicker in excitement over anything new. Soon it was like he had always been a part of our lives. We quickly forgot what life was like before him.

Alek has taught me so much. He was and still is always on the move. He is curious and insightful. He tests his boundaries and limits and his body and my nerves. He loves any physical activity. He loves sports. Baseball and hockey are his favorites. He picks things up quickly, he wants to be the first and the fastest. Just try slowing him down. He gets revved up and overstimulated easy which drives us insane, but he has quickly learned how to settle down and redeem himself. He loves music, especially dance parties with mommy and Maks and rocking out with daddy in the car.

Alek loves to learn, he is fascinated by anything new. He is always asking questions. He is a sponge. Alek loves to read. It blows my mind that he is reading to me now. He loves to write, but struggles with wanting it to be perfect. He does not like to make mistakes.
He loves exploring the creek, the woods, digging in the dirt for critters to take care of and save. He loves the beach. He can spend hours looking for perfect rocks and shells. Alek loves to swim, ride his scooter, swing higher and faster then Maks and then jump off the swing making my heart skip a beat.
He has such a great heart, he is a good friend, his teachers say he always helps others and includes everyone in his play.

He is an amazing big brother. I am convinced he the reason Maks' transition was easier then we thought it would be. Though he plays the typical big bro with teasing and fighting, you can tell how much he loves his little brother and he would do anything for him.

Alek melts my heart with his phrases, "Mommy, you're my sweetie, Mom you are beautiful, You are my gal, You are the best mommy in the world, I love my family, mom-You are the cutiePatootie".
I am so proud to be his mom. Such an amazing soul who keeps our lives filled with happiness and laughter. It is a priviledge to watch him grow. Alek was the answer to our prayers for a child, our little dream come true.

My Maks

In honor of Mother's Day I want to pay tribute to these amazing little creatures who have made me a mama.

Maks-Joseph, Maks, Maky, Makadoo, Makadoodle, Makaroni, our Mak-attack..

This kid is amazing. I admire him so much. I think of that first visit in Murmansk, when he was pale, sick, and scared, yet him let us hold him, he started to open himself up to us. What a brave little man. What a brave and amazing little soul, who left all he ever knew (not by choice) and travel thousands of miles away to a new home with people who were complete strangers. Despite having to spend a week in the hosptial with a woman who he barely knew, he was brave and he fought and he allowed himself to be loved and to eventually love us. It still amazes me how resilient he was and still is. It brings tears to my eyes when I put myself in his shoes and imagine all he was feeling and how scarey it must have all been for him. While he clung to Kevin quickly, he took his time with me. It was hard for me, who was used to being the mama bear to Alek and Alek always running to me first. I love having mama's boys. I look back during Maks' first surgical procedure when post op he wanted no parts of me, I tried all my tricks to soothe him, but he only settled once he was in daddy's arms. Fast forward to 2 weeks ago, in recovery after surgery, he only wanted mommy and settled in my arms. I made it all better. I am mom.

I love his resilence, his fight, his stubborness, his curiosity, his laugh, his giggle and his smile. His face will light up your day, his glare will leave you shaking. His laugh is contagious and his smile wil melt your heart. In seconds he can have you laughing only to have tp send him to time-out. He knows how to push all your buttons, yet can wrap you around his little finger.

He had the greatest, raspiest, deep voice and now he has this high pitched voice, it just sounds so foreign and silly to me. I miss his voice.

I love how everyday he says, Mom, you're my best. He loves high fives, fist pump fireworks, hugs and kisses. He always says, Mom, can I kiss your cheek?

He loves riding his bike and his scooter. He loves puzzles and legos and Matchbox cars. He loves superheros and monsters. He loves swinging as high as he can and rolling down grassy hills. He loves digging in the dirt, finding worms and bugs and feeding them to the fish.

He loves the beach, the water, the sand. He loves his family and his friends. He loves life.

Maks is an amazing little man, who I am so blessed and grateful to have call me mommy.